Ep #12 Toxic Friendships: Six Types of Friends to Avoid

Did you know that the people in your circle influence the decisions you make? Taking time to inspect your environment and how it is feeding you is crucial, and your relationships form a large part of your environment.

 

In this episode I share, some of my experiences with friendships that have had a limiting effect on me. The stories are true but the names are fictitious. You may find some of these rates in a relative, co-worker or even yourself- as I did. 

 

 

 

Passive Aggressive Porsha

 

My first Porsha was in secondary school. The day the friendship came to an end was when she borrowed my shoes and refused to give them back. I demanded that they are returned and she threw them at me in anger. In all fairness, we were only 12 or 13 so you can just imagine these little people squabbling :)

 

 

Opinionated Olivia

 

Since friendships are made up of two or more people, we cannot ignore the role our personality plays in forging that relationship. I believe there are some combinations that just won’t work. And it might not even be a personality trait issue, it could be a mindset issue. Case in point.

 

Olivia and I had been friends for over a decade. We were there for each other and you know, spent a lot of time together. The friction commenced when I started my living authentically journey.

 

 

Rigid Rita is close-minded and allergic to growth. She is probably loyal and kind-hearted, but her reluctance to grow will hold you back. We live in a time where things are changing at a rapid pace. You have to be aware of changes going on in the world if you are going to be doing business with anyone outside your family. Ritas simply do not believe in evolving and in the end, it will be like running a two-legged race while your partner walks or stands still.

 

 

Competitive Clarissa

This lady here has used you as the template for her advancement. When you turn right, she must turn right twice. She cannot behove the thought of you doing better than her. She may not deliberately try to drown you, but if you are drowning, she’d help you out, then go on to blame you for falling into the river in the first place. 

 

 

Loose-Lipped Lolita

You better not share any secrets. Here’s a general rule. Anyone who will gossip about their friend is already talking about you. I had a personal experience of this a few years ago. This person talked dirty about her friends, many of whom I had never met.

 

Ursula the User.

Ursula can only be reached when she wants something from you- Ursula is that girl that is perpetually busy but has time to call you for financial help or to obtain emotional support. She calls to pick your brains and ask for advice. All of which is fine. But when you have a need, she is so sorry but unavailable to help.

 

 

What is your friendship game like? What does your circle look like? I believe the people in our circle can influence how we think and therefore what we do. Your life- whether it is good or evolving is the result of your environment because your environment feeds your mind. 

 

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References:

10 signs of a Passive-Aggressive Relationship