Living Inside Out with Toks

Ep #110 Turn 2024’s Challenges Into Your Blueprint for an Extraordinary 2025

Welcome to this week’s episode! Over the past two weeks, your feedback on Kairos: The Power of Perfect Timing and A Time to Act has been nothing short of humbling. Many of you have shared how these episodes have resonated deeply, inspiring you to re-evaluate procrastination and the hidden consequences of time.

 

This week, I want to take it a step further. 2024 has been a challenging year for so many, myself included. But I’ve realised that challenges don’t just test us, they teach us. And those lessons can become the blueprint we use to navigate 2025 with clarity and determination.

 

In today’s episode, I share three powerful mindsets to help you transform life’s trials into stepping stones:

 

1. Reframing Your Perspective:

Learn how to give challenges a new meaning and navigate difficult relationships without unnecessary pain.

 

2. Acting in Faith:

Discover why God often leads us to take unrelated, sometimes illogical actions—and how obedience can lead to unexpected breakthroughs.

 

3. Finding Peace Amidst the Storm:

Understand how creating inner peace provides clarity, strength, and the ability to move forward even in the midst of chaos.

 

This episode is more than a reflection on 2024; it’s an invitation to step boldly into 2025 with a renewed mindset and a clear purpose.

 

Special Invitation:

Join me on Saturday, 28th December, at 10am UK time for a free Zoom session. We’ll explore how to take this year's lessons and turn them into a practical plan for the year ahead. Registration is essential; visit our website or Eventbrite to sign up.

 

Links and Resources:

• Visit our website: toksaruoture.com

•  Register for our Online Event on Eventbrite

•Mentioned episodes: Episode 106 - Social Media Crisis Management

• Episode 106: Finding Calm in the (Social Media) Chaos
• Episode 108: Kairos: Power of Perfect Timing
• Episode 109: A Time to Act

•HangOut Cafe with Pastor Funke Adeaga: Watch on YouTube 

• Follow me on social media for more inspiration and updates: Instagram, LinkedIn YouTube

• Ready to take bold steps toward your purpose? I offer 1:1 coaching and group coaching programmes to help you live from the inside out.

 

If you found this episode valuable, please leave a five-star review and share it with someone who needs it. Your feedback truly means the world to me, and I’d love to hear how this episode is impacting you, so hit me up on social media!

 

Till next time, remember to live from the inside out. ✨

 

 

 

Ep #109 A Time to Act: Addressing the fears holding you back

Following last week’s episode on Kairos moments, which became the second most-listened-to episode of 2024 (thank you so much for your incredible feedback!), I felt led to continue this conversation. So today, we’re diving into the natural next step: taking action.

 

What do you do once you recognise that now is the time?

 

In this episode, I explore three “little foxes” that hold us back from acting with courage:

1. The Fear of Being Wrong:

• How our narrow definitions of success and failure keep us stuck.

• Why “wrong” might actually be a lesson in disguise—and how to shift your mindset.

2. The Fear of Being Different:

• Embracing your unique path and learning to love what sets you apart.

• Why standing out is worth the discomfort and how to start celebrating your individuality.

3. The Fear of Not Being Enough:

• How feelings of inadequacy can lead us to sabotage our own progress.

• Recognising that you already have everything you need to bring your ideas to life.

 

I also share personal stories—like revisiting the lessons I learned after losing everything and starting over, and how this year’s challenges have led to incredible growth and clarity in my purpose.

 

Key Takeaways:

• Your spirit is superior to your body; it speaks truth and guides you toward courageous action.

• Every idea comes equipped with everything it needs to succeed. Nothing is missing.

• The courage to act begins with uprooting the fears that are silently stealing your progress.

 

Links and Resources:

• Visit my website: toksaruoture.com

• Follow me on social media for more inspiration and updates: Instagram, LinkedIn YouTube

• Ready to take bold steps toward your purpose? I offer 1:1 coaching and group coaching programmes to help you live from the inside out.

 

If you found this episode valuable, please leave a five-star review and share it with someone who needs it. Your feedback truly means the world to me, and I’d love to hear how this episode is impacting you—so hit me up on social!

 

Till next time, remember to live from the inside out. ✨

Ep #108 What’s Really Holding You Back: Kairos and the Power of Perfect Timing

Welcome back to the Living Inside Out podcast! In this episode, I explore the concept of time—not just as we know it but in its two distinct forms: Chronos (quantitative, linear time) and Kairos (divine, opportune moments). This conversation stems from a personal revelation about how small, often invisible habits, those “little foxes”, can block us from achieving our goals.

 

Here’s what you can expect in this episode:

• The Myth of Tomorrow: Why the phrase “I’ll do it tomorrow” is the most dangerous thing we tell ourselves.

• Chronos vs Kairos: Breaking down the difference between measurable time and critical, spiritual moments.

• The Power of Kairos Moments: Understanding and acting in your appointed time can lead to exponential growth.

• A Personal Story: My unexpected journey of learning luxury branding at Fortnum & Mason and how it completely transformed my business approach.

• Procrastination’s Silent Damage: Why hesitation and delay are subtle yet effective tools to derail destiny.

• Practical Steps: How to recognise and act on your Kairos moments, align your spirit with God’s timing, and stop missing opportunities meant for your growth.

 

Key Takeaways:

 

1. Time is more than a tool; it’s life itself. Every moment is loaded with potential to create life-altering results.

2. Kairos moments aren’t bound by human schedules. They’re divine opportunities that require spiritual sensitivity and action.

3. Procrastination is the thief of destiny. When you say “later,” you’re allowing comfort and hesitation to rob you of your appointed time.

 

I challenge you to reflect on the moments you’ve let slip away because of hesitation. What would be different if you acted in faith instead of waiting for the “perfect time”?

 

Resources and Links:

Ecclesiastes 1

 

• Visit my website: toksaruoture.com

• Follow me on social media for more inspiration and updates: Instagram, LinkedIn YouTube

• Want to go deeper? I offer 1:1 coaching and group coaching programmes to help you live from the inside out and achieve your divine purpose.

 

Thank you for listening! Please subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. Let’s connect again next week as we continue the journey of living intentionally and purposefully.

 

And remember, live from the inside out. ✨

Ep #107 How to Share Your Story Authentically Without Fear

Hello, and welcome back to Living Inside Out! This episode is close to my heart because we’re diving into a topic that affects so many of us; self-consciousness. Whether you’re a student, an entrepreneur, or someone just trying to figure things out, that nagging voice in your head saying, “What will they think?” can hold you back from truly living your life.

 

This week, I had the privilege of guest-lecturing at Goldsmiths, University of London. I was invited to teach a class on Entrepreneurship to the Master’s students studying Luxury Brand Management. Let me tell you, I was in my zone! Speaking to others about mindset, growth, and living authentically is one of the ways I come alive. But the truth is, this wasn’t always the case. Years ago, I struggled with self-consciousness and the fear of being judged. Sound familiar? If so, you’re not alone, and this episode is for you.

 

Here’s what we cover in this episode:

•The Realisation That Set Me Free: Why nobody is thinking about you as much as you think they are, and how this can change your perspective on storytelling and vulnerability.

•The Difference Between Authenticity and Oversharing: How to share your story in a way that inspires and uplifts, not just to vent or seek validation.

•Three Practical Steps to Telling Your Story Boldly:

1.Get to Know Yourself: Why self-discovery is the foundation of authenticity.

2.Examine Your Intentions: Understanding the why behind your words and actions.

3.Write It Out First: How crafting and owning your story beforehand can turn self-consciousness into confidence.

 

One of the students at Goldsmiths asked me a fantastic question: “How come you’re so bold in sharing authentically?” Her concern, like many of us, was rooted in the fear of being judged. My answer? Nobody is keeping score. Most people are busy being the star of their own story, and what they think of you often says more about them than it does about you.

 

We’ll also explore how to handle those who genuinely critique or misunderstand you and why their opinions are, frankly, none of your business.

 

Lastly, I’ll share why it’s important to only share what you’re comfortable with and have healed from. Your story is powerful, but it’s not a dumping ground for unresolved emotions.

 

Resources Mentioned:

•Proverbs 20:5
The purpose in a man's heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out. 

•Choose your Mindset Course or Workshops: Your mindset is your foundation. Learn how to tell your story authentically while building your personal brand.

•Episode #106 (sorry I said 105 but its 106) On handling the Facebook disruption.

•Connect with me on Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, and YouTube! Let’s continue the conversation.

 

Subscribe and Review:

If this episode spoke to you, I’d love it if you could give the podcast a 5-star rating. It helps others find the show and keeps the content coming!

 

As always, thank you for listening and being part of this amazing community. Until next time, remember to live from the inside out. You’ve got this! ❤️

 

Toks

 

Ep #106 Calm in the Chaos: How I Handled a Social Media Crisis

What do you do when something unexpected, like being locked out of your Facebook accounts, threatens to derail your day and disrupt your business? In this episode, I share my journey through a recent digital crisis, highlighting the steps I took to stay calm, productive, and resilient. From managing the initial panic to leaning on faith, family, and routines, this episode is packed with practical lessons for handling challenges with grace and perspective.

 

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

•How to manage panic and regain control in moments of uncertainty.

•The importance of taking practical steps while knowing when to step away.

•Why routines are essential guardrails in times of chaos.

•Leadership tips for setting the tone during a crisis.

•How to gain a healthier perspective on challenges by anchoring yourself in faith, family, and context.

•The critical lesson of not putting all your digital eggs in one basket.

•How to plan for the future to mitigate risks and strengthen your business.

 

While this experience is related to my business, the tips and strategies I share will work in your personal life too. We cannot avoid disruptions, but we can regain control if we manage it properly.

 

Have you experienced a digital disruption or unexpected challenge in your business? Share your story with me on [LinkedIn](your link) or [Instagram](your link). Let’s start a conversation about staying resilient and prepared for the unexpected.

 

Resource:

•Tips for preventing a Facebook suspension:

https://chatterblast.com/blog/it-happened-to-me-staying-calm-when-facebook-suspends-your-account/

 

 

Connect with Me:

•Website

• LinkedIn

•Instagram

If you enjoyed this episode, I’d love for you to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss an update. And if you found this conversation helpful, please take a moment to rate and review it—it really helps to spread the word and reach more people who could benefit from these insights. Your support means so much to me. Thank you!

 

Ep #105: A Conversation with Getrude Matshe on Purpose, Passion, and Unity

In this inspiring episode, Toks speaks with Getrude Matshe—3-time TEDx Speaker, author, serial social entrepreneur, and philanthropy consultant. Getrude, known for her vibrant energy and commitment to empowering women, shares her insights on finding one’s purpose and using it to uplift others. The conversation explores her journey, her belief in the African philosophy of Ubuntu, and her mission to educate and empower Africa’s next generation. Getrude’s story is one of resilience, self-belief, and an unbreakable commitment to community and unity.

Key Takeaways

• Embracing Responsibility: Getrude shares her powerful experience of taking on the responsibility of raising 49 children orphaned by HIV. Her story exemplifies the Ubuntu philosophy—"I am because we are"—and her deep-rooted belief in uplifting her community.

• Ubuntu in All Areas of Life: Getrude describes the Ubuntu philosophy and its wide-reaching impact across various fields, from business to technology. Ubuntu is about recognising our interconnectedness and using it to drive success, unity, and compassion.

• Philanthropy Starts at Home: For Getrude, being philanthropic isn’t just about large-scale projects; it’s about supporting those closest to us first. Building strong relationships at home can be the foundation for creating positive ripples in the wider community.

• Overcoming Self-Doubt: Getrude shares her empowering affirmation for self-doubt: “Listen, I need to do this; I know I have the ability to do this.” Her resilience and inner drive are a testament to the strength that comes from believing in one’s capabilities.

• Trusting Your Ideas: According to Getrude, if you have an idea, you already have the inherent knowledge and ability to bring it to life. Her advice encourages listeners to take action on their passions and trust in their potential.

• Redefining Failure: Failure, for Getrude, is simply the act of not trying. She shares her perspective that life’s setbacks are stepping stones to growth and that the real failure lies in ignoring a desire to act. With this mindset, Getrude has been able to embrace challenges and learn from every experience.

This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking to find purpose, strengthen their community, and overcome the fear of failure. Getrude’s journey is a powerful reminder that purpose and passion can drive positive change in ourselves and those around us.

 

NEXT STEPS:

If you need support, feel free to email Toks at pa@toksaruoture.com. As a certified coach, she helps individuals overcome limiting thoughts and unlock their full potential. Connect with us on social media @toksaruoture for daily inspiration and insights.

Have you subscribed to this podcast? If not, why don’t you do so on your favourite podcast app? Also, head to Youtube.com/toksaruoture to watch and subscribe to Living Inside Out, for more impactful conversations and personal growth content.

We would love to connect with you on social! Let’s stay in touch on toksaruoture.com and hang out on Instagram @toksaruoture and on Facebook at Living Inside Out.

Thank you for listening, and see you next time on Living Inside Out!

Ep #104 Redefining Luxury with Elizabeth Solaru

In This Powerful Episode of Living Inside Out, Toks Sits Down with Elizabeth Solaru

 

In this episode, Toks Aruoture has an inspiring conversation with Elizabeth Solaru, a multi-award-winning luxury business consultant, author of The Luxpreneur, and former microbiologist turned cake artist. Elizabeth’s journey from science to the world of luxury and entrepreneurship is filled with incredible insights and transformative lessons on building a brand, finding your unique voice, and embracing authenticity.

 

Key Topics Covered:

 

•The Power of Authenticity: Elizabeth shares how staying true to yourself is essential when building a luxury brand. She explores how authenticity not only attracts the right audience but also strengthens brand loyalty.

•Building a Successful Luxury Brand: Learn the fundamentals of luxury branding, from mindset to strategy, and how Elizabeth built her own brand from the ground up while maintaining integrity and excellence.

•The Power of Storytelling in Business: Elizabeth delves into the importance of storytelling in creating a compelling brand narrative that resonates with clients and sets your brand apart in the luxury market.

•Diversity in Luxury: As the founder of the Diversity in Luxury Awards, Elizabeth also touches on the need for inclusivity and how diversity is reshaping the luxury industry.

 

Key Takeaways:

 

•Embrace Your Authenticity and Move Forward: Elizabeth reminds us to “Do it Afraid”—take risks and step forward even when facing fear or doubt.

•Luxury Starts with You: True luxury begins within, with a mindset focused on excellence, self-worth, and the value you bring to others.

•The 5 Key Pillars of a Luxury Mindset: Elizabeth outlines the foundational elements needed to develop a luxury mindset, essential for anyone aspiring to build a brand in this space.

 

Resources Mentioned:

 

•The Luxpreneur by Elizabeth Solaru – A must-read for those looking to elevate their business through the principles of luxury and authenticity.

•Diversity in Luxury Awards – A groundbreaking initiative recognising excellence and inclusivity within the luxury industry.

 

Connect with Elizabeth Solaru:

 

•Instagram: @elizabethsolaru – Follow Elizabeth for insights and inspiration in luxury, entrepreneurship, and personal growth.

•Website: ElizabethSolauru.com – Learn more about her consultancy, upcoming events, and luxury courses.

•LinkedIn: Elizabeth Solaru – Connect with Elizabeth for more professional insights and opportunities.

 

Listen to this Episode on:

Ep #103 Overcoming Hidden Burnout

Let's talk about the reality of burnout—a hidden culprit behind feelings of exhaustion, detachment, and lack of motivation. Drawing from my recent experience, I’ll walk you through what burnout really looks like, the subtle signs to watch for, and practical ways to move from depletion to revitalisation. Whether you’re feeling a general sense of dreariness or struggling to find your motivation, this episode will offer insights, solutions, and encouragement to help you reclaim your spark.

 

Key Points:

 

1. What is Burnout?

Burnout is a state of chronic physical and emotional exhaustion resulting from prolonged stress. It can impact your motivation, emotional health, and even your physical well-being.

2. Signs of Burnout:

•Physical and Emotional Exhaustion: Feeling drained, fatigued, and unable to recover.

•Decreased Motivation: Finding it hard to stay productive and motivated.

•Detachment and Isolation: Withdrawing from relationships or feeling disconnected.

•Irritability and Frustration: Easily triggered by small stressors.

•Difficulty Concentrating: Struggling with focus and memory.

3. My Personal Journey Through Burnout:

•I share my own recent experience with burnout, how I recognised it, and the challenges I faced in acknowledging it.

4. Solutions for Alleviating Burnout:

•Set Boundaries: Protect your personal time by creating clear work-life boundaries.

•Prioritise Rest: Make rest and sleep a consistent priority.

•Practice Self-Compassion: Allow yourself grace, and remember that healing takes time.

•Engage in Physical Activity: Move in ways that feel good to you, even if it’s a short walk.

•Seek Support: Find people or communities to connect with, whether friends, family, or professional support.

5. Inspiration and Action:

•Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their own experiences, recognise signs of burnout, and implement one small step towards reclaiming balance.

 

Key Takeaways:

 

•Burnout can sneak up on us, especially when we feel unmotivated or weary without a clear reason.

•Recognising signs of burnout is crucial for taking steps towards recovery and finding joy in everyday life again.

•Solutions exist, and they’re often simpler than we realise, from setting boundaries to practising self-compassion.

 

Next Steps:

If you’re feeling exhausted or struggling with motivation, take a moment to assess where you might need rest or support. Small changes can have a powerful impact. Let this episode be your guide in moving from burnout to balance.

Ep #102 Forging Her Own Path: Shadé Akande on Resilience, Leadership, and the Power of ONE X LEAGUE

In this episode, I had an incredible conversation with Shadé Akande, founder of ONE X LEAGUE. Shadé, raised as a first-generation American by Nigerian parents, shares her experiences of navigating culture clashes, embracing risk, and learning to trust herself—lessons that shaped her personal and professional journey.

You can watch this episode on YouTube

 

We dive into:

 

•Growing Up Nigerian-American: Shadé talks about the culture clashes of being raised by Nigerian parents in the United States and how those experiences influenced her career choices and personal growth.

•Career Evolution: From the fashion industry to HR at some of the biggest global companies like Google and Verizon, Shadé explains how each step in her career taught her more about people and herself.

•Launching ONE X LEAGUE: Shadé shares the mission behind ONE X LEAGUE, a private membership for Black and Afro-Latina executive women, and the upcoming ONE SUITE RETREAT, a retreat for Black executives, both male and female, happening in February next year.

•Risk-Taking and Resilience: We discuss the importance of taking risks, learning from failures, and building resilience in the face of entrepreneurship challenges.

•Building Your Tribe: A major theme of our conversation revolves around creating a supportive network. Shadé shares insights on how to build a tribe of mentors and supporters and reflects on our own trip to the Amalfi Coast, where we strengthened our community of women.

•Mentorship: We also explore how mentorship plays a vital role in personal and professional growth, and how to find the right mentors if you’re just starting out.

 

Shadé’s story is filled with practical insights and powerful lessons for anyone looking to take charge of their career, build resilience, and create a supportive network.

 

Next Steps:

If you loved this episode, make sure to subscribe and leave a review! You can connect with Shadé and learn more about ONE X LEAGUE at onexleague.com.  Stay tuned for more insightful conversations, and follow us on @toksa to never miss an episode!

Ep #101 A New Chapter: Looking Back, Moving Forward

Welcome back to Living Inside Out! After a brief hiatus, we’re back with a fresh new look and an exciting direction for the podcast. In this first episode of our new season, Toks Aruoture reflects on the journey so far, shares some of the lessons learned along the way, and gives you a sneak peek into what’s to come.

 

Here’s what you’ll hear in today’s episode:

 • Why taking a step back and pausing to reflect was so important.

 • A deep dive into the lessons Toks has learned over the past few years, including insights on faith, burnout, and personal growth.

 • An exciting new direction for the podcast, with more interviews, deeper conversations, and transparency about Toks’ own personal journey.

 • A look ahead at some incredible upcoming guests—people you’re familiar with and new voices to inspire you.
 • How this season has been designed with YOU in mind, offering insights and conversations that will help you live a more authentic and fulfilling life.

 

Key Lessons from Today’s Episode:

 • “Nothing has meaning except the meaning you give it” – A powerful reflection on how we can frame our experiences and challenges.

 • The importance of aligning with your purpose and reassessing where you’re headed.

 • How to take care of yourself in the process and avoid burnout while still moving forward in life.

We’re thrilled to be back and can’t wait to continue this journey with you!

 

Your next steps:

If you loved today’s episode, be sure to:

 1. Subscribe to our YouTube channel to catch the new video episodes, interviews, and more.

 2. Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform so you never miss an episode—whether it’s Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

 3. And don’t forget, the waitlist is still open for our Get Unstuck program which begins on the 1st of November. It’s your chance to join a transformational journey to move forward in life with purpose and clarity.

Join the wait list to be considered

 

Resources

Introduction: A Perfect Storm

The Future is Superior to the Present 

Toxic Friendships: Six Types of Friends to Avoid

Get Unstuck Wait List

If you need support, email pa@toksaruoture.com. As a certified coach, I help individuals overcome limiting thoughts. Connect with me on social media @toksaruoture.

 

Have you subscribed to this podcast? Why don’t you do so on your favourite podcast app? Then head to Youtube.com/toksaruoture to watch and subscribe to my show, Living Inside Out.

I would LOVE to connect with you on social; let's stay in touch at toksauoture.com and hang out together on Instagram- @toksaruoture and on Facebook, Living Inside Out.

 

See you next time on Living Inside Out!